Thursday, September 07, 2006

Childrens Wisdom - 11

Children’s Wisdom - His Majesty The King From A Mother Who Used Wits
I am sure many mothers have had to deal with a stubborn child. It was so often a battle of wills, and mother won because she was stronger. The first word my son learned to say was “no”. To try to get him to do anything would bring on an immediate “no” The bossing approach had to be given up. I learned to phrase my questions so they couldn’t be answered with a “no”. For example, “Do you want your potatoes here or here as I would point on his plate?” When it was time to dress I would put out two outfits, do you want this one or that one? Since he got to choose, it usually worked. When it was cold outside: “Do you want to wear the sweater or the jacket.” as I pointed to them. I learned never to say: “Do you want to go to bed?” It was “tell me when you want to go to bed. so we can read.” He loved to hear stories. I occupied myself in the kitchen but it never took very long. We went upstairs together usually in my arms. You did not dare pick him up without his permission. I took advantage of this opportunity because it was so rare. You can imagine the problem in the Super Market. He would rather push the cart than ride. This worked most of the time because I praised him for being a good driver. The next stage was “Do It Self” When it was time for the potatoes, he wanted to “do it self.” I solved this with a bigger spoon. Dressing: “do it self.” I had to watch him struggle to button his shirt, but I solved this with an outfit he could handle.. One night at reading time, he took the book out of my hand: “Do it self”. He began to “read” the Three Little Pigs which he knew by heart. He huffed and puffed and all, turning the pages at the right time with the pictures. The next book lasted three sessions. One major plus was toilet training. I introduced him to the Potty and showed him how it worked. I used his favorite word: “You can do it self.” I’m sure he set the record in how quick he learned. He has become a real pleasure. He asks for vegetables. He asks me to hold him in my arms. He holds my hand when we walk together. I still avoid telling him what to do. I wait for him to take the lead. Recently I got busy in the kitchen and forgot about bedtime. He came and got me. I feel greatly honored by our little king. Mothers, using wits is better than battling wills.


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